GMT

Today in History: February 24

0786 Pepin the Short of Gaul dies. His dominions are divided between his sons Charles (Charlemagne) and Carloman.

1803 Chief Justice John Marshall, by refusing to rule on the case of Marbury vs. Madison, asserts the authority of the judicial branch.

1836 Some 3,000 Mexicans launch an assault on the Alamo with its 182 Texan defenders.

1868 US House of Representatives vote 126 to 47 to impeach President Andrew Johnson

1916 A film version of Jules Verne's 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea opens in New York.

1991 General Norman Schwarzkopf, commander of the coalition army, sends in ground forces during the Gulf War.

2020 New York firefighter Daniel Foley, who found his brother's body in ruins of World Trade Center, dies of cancer bringing first responders death toll to 343

2021 United Nations-backed COVAX initiative begins delivering vaccines to middle and low income countries with first AstraZeneca shipment to Ghana

2022 Russian leader Vladimir Putin announces the start of a “special military operation” in Ukraine to "demilitarize" the country moments before Russia launches a full-scale pre-dawn invasion by land, air and sea, with bombings in several cities amid international condemnation

Born on February 24

1885 Chester Nimitz, U.S. admiral who commanded naval forces in the Pacific during WWII.


JOTD
An engineer dies and is sent to hell

He's hot and miserable, so he decides to take action. The A/C has been busted for a long time, so he fixes it. Things cool down quickly. The moving walkway motor jammed, so he un-jams it. People can get from place to place more easily. The TV was grainy and unclear, so he fixes the connection to the Satellite dish and now they get hundreds of high def channels.
One day, God decides to look down on Hell to see how his grand design is working out and notices that everyone is happy and enjoying umbrella drinks. He asks the Devil what's up?
The Devil says, "Things are great down here since you sent us an engineer."
"What?" says God. "An engineer? I didn't send you one of those. That must have been a mistake. Send him upstairs immediately."
The Devil responds, "No way. We want to keep our engineer. We like him."
God demands, "If you don't send him to me immediately, I'll sue!"
The Devil laughs. "Where are YOU going to get a lawyer?"